The Twelve Days of (Christmas) the Mayan ApocalypsePosted: December 7, 2012
Since the world is ending in two weeks, I thought we should get started with our planning for what comes afterward. I’m not sure what will happen on December 21, so I’m going to offer up a number of scenarios to help you be prepared for whatever comes our way. Please join in and comment. It’s only fun if you play along.
Day 1: Kill All The Liars Lawyers, Politicians, and Lobbyists
Imagine the night of December 20th, a meteor crashes to earth in Washington, D.C. and releases a deadly alien virus. The disease is quickly spread from politician to politician. Lobbyists, government hacks, and lawyers quickly pass the virus to everyone they come in close proximity to.
On December 21, in the middle of a press conference, Barack Obama drops dead.
The press corps that has worshipped him since before he was elected also dies. Even those guys from Fox News drop like flies.
All across the country, congressmen, mayors, even selectmen take a ride in the meat wagon. In the span of two days there is not a lawyer or elected government official alive anywhere on earth. The entirety of world governments are wiped out.
All the idiot actors who speak on behalf of politicians of any party get sick and die, too. Their money and fame can’t save them.
Every law and every legal document goes up in flames. Don’t ask me how a virus causes this, it’s very technical. Trust me the same way you trusted those creeps.
The only people left are the people those thieves were stealing from. So, in our new world, let’s try and come up with a system that protects the little guy.
Who do you nominate to lead the survivors?
(Preferably someone still alive on December 23rd.)
Bonus: propose a law in 50 simple words or less.
You’ll need something to do in the post-civilized world, so order one of my books while Amazon’s servers are still up and UPS is still delivering! Your money won’t be worth anything on December 22nd, so spend it while you can.